Monday, November 17, 2008

THIS IS HILARIOUS!


THE SUSPENDED ONE?

I normally do not write about religious stuff. I read religious stuff. But when religious stuff goes from the ridiculous to the ludicrous I do get curious and in the process some cats get mushed up. Today the cat is JAKIM. How so? Read


AN APPEAL LETTER TO JAKIM…ASKING PERMISION FOR SEX WITH MY WIFE

Jabatan Kemajuan Islam Malaysia

Aras 4-9 Blok D7,
Pusat Pentadbiran Kerajaan Persekutuan, 62519
W.P PUTRAJAYA, MALAYSIA


Hi Jack,


I just got married yesterday. I assure you I got married to a woman.


My wife insisted to have sex with me yesterday. As a loyal citizen of this country, I refused to entertain her request. I am writing to seek permission from you, the exact date and time I can have sex with my wife. Please do not delay your permission, as my urge is much stronger than hers. I appreciate your urgent attention on this matter.


Please spell out clearly by return mail, all the sexual positions and types of sex, I can practice. I humbly request that you do not shorten the list, as you will understand, I just got married yesterday.


I make this solemn promise to you; I will abide by all your terms and conditions. You may want to send your representative from time to time to verify the accuracy of my claims. After you grant me permission to have sex with my wife, I wish to inform you that, I will be conducting all my sexual activities in dark; hence it is advisable that your representative bring a torchlight with him. I further promise to keep the window of my bedroom partially open, so that my sexual activities will never be disputed. The angle of the opened window will be worked out according to your instruction.


As you would have known, I am a novice in sex. If I am not troubling you too much, can you also furnish me diagrams and graphics or pictures, that you may have in your possession, as it would help me very much in accurately dealing with all my penetrations, etc. Again I promise you; all my insertions and penetrations will be accurately carried out according to your instructions.


Please also let me know the maximum erectile length that is allowed for newly married couple. I promise you, I will not exceed that length. Please also let me know whether my wife needs to send a separate letter to check on the depth of my penetration allowed by you.


And also spell out clearly to me whether there is any ‘give and take’ allowance should I accidentally exceed the mandatory requirement.

Go HERE for more of Hi Jack.....

( thank you to the sjs team for allowing me to post this piece, although without prior permission)



NEWS BREAK:

RPK was told to report to the Sentul Police Station at 3:00pm tomorrow. We are reliably informed that JACK has made a police report against Pete. Is it Jack's move to prepare Pete for the post of Minister of Religious Affairs in the new government? God does work in mysterious ways, but not the way of Maradona.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Zorro, hijacking RPK again is not funny! For goodness sake, why are they so disturbed by this one man with a pen! If Jack feels threatened by RPK's writing, don't read it!

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha, ho ho ho! I'm gonna die laughing.

valentino

Anonymous said...

Hi Zorro Unmasked,

We have no objection of you publishing any of our articles. We believe vital information should be made known to Malaysian public freely and without any fear and intimidation.

Cheers to you our brother...keep the fighting spirit.

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha, what a letter, the humourest article of the day..i wish jack has the capability and the least of humour sense reading this, or, they might invoke the Isa again...

chapchai said...

Uncle Zorro

Can you persuade RPK to take some time off and temporarily migrate to the UK with Marina (or even Australia). The powers that be are hell bent on getting him one way or another and they will succeed unless DSAI can topple the govt. in the near future although this doesn't look very likely.

From someone who is concerned for RPK's safety (both mental and physical).

Anonymous said...

Agree chapchai. If Pete and family migrate to a free country, at least he can write freely without the threat of ISA arrest hanging over his shoulders. This way, he can really expose all the shit about those umno goons.

Anonymous said...

Looks as if Botak and Najis have sent out word that RPK must be silenced (hopefully not by C4) at all cost before he spills some more beans for all to see.

It only shows that Najis and Botak fear RPK more than their judgement day.

Anonymous said...

Dr M says there's a surge in racial talks and gossips lately. I can smell it in the air that something is brewing. Everyone needs to be careful and vigilant.

Concerned Malaysian

Samuel Goh Kim Eng said...

MADNESS OVER PERSONAL BUSINESS

How do you like all your personal movements
Being monitored like nobody's business
Even in your private love making moments
There's no end to their 'puritan' madness

(c) Samuel Goh Kim Eng - 181108
http://MotivationInMotion.blogspot.com
Tue. 18th Nov. 2008.

Anonymous said...

When the mamak says there is a surge in racial talks and gossips, he is the prime culprit.

This self-styled mamak does not reveal his Indian Malayalee roots. Sometimes he even claims that his father was a Pakistani.

This evil man who is now rooting for Najis in his mistaken belief that his son will be favourably looked upon by the anointed PM-to-be is going to die of sheer shock when another racist KJ or Toyo the Botox is elected as the UMNO youth chief.

He sowed the seeds of racism and his son is going to reap its evil products.When one day the Malays realize that they were taken for a jolly good ride by the mamak and his coterie of cronies, they will make sure the mamaks' history in this country is rewritten to portray what they are - vile parasites of the lowest type.

kalimullah hassan said...

do you have a RPK shrine at home ?
you should you know!

Anonymous said...

HI JACK, ...hahaha...sorilah !!

Anonymous said...

Folks !, Uncle Jack has replied to this letter,---"-dog style banned......... Those of you who are still in doubt .....could have your difficulties in suspension sorted out once and for all .

MY !MY! what a warning they have been pasted with also!!!!!!!

http://sjsandteam.wordpress.com

zorro said...

Kalimullah Hassan: You asked:do you have a RPK shrine at home ?
you should you know!

No actually, but we have your shrine guarding the public toilet near the polis pondok that the Home Minister wants to demolish. We will hold a demo (no candlelight vigil for you...vigils are for good people who are wronged)...so we will have a demo to prevent the demolition of your shrine. Howszat?...always thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

Hijack dun read here kerana taktau
inggeris one !!