IJOK REVISITED: YB PARTHIBAN, DON'T JUMP INTO ANYTHING UNLESS SAFE.

CONGRATULATIONS YANG BERHOMAT K. PARTHIBAN.

After our brief get-together at Kopitiam King Kuan, Tuesday last, I did a posting on you. I said I liked you from the start. I also said that because of this I was hoping you would not win for your own good. However, you won thus my felicitations and good wishes.

They said that both parties played dirty. I was not there so this accusation is of no consequence. However, YB Parthiban, your mission to deliver is NOW.

Your first act would be to muster all the help you need to clean up the towns of the election paraphernalia. Don’t expect Keadilan to do this. The vanquished usually have no mood for this. Don’t expect Khir Toyo to do this….to him this may seem a menial exercise.

Next you have to go thru your checklist of promises to keep. Remember you do not have much time as the General Election is looming. Prioritize your promises….the important ones first and they have to do with promises to the people of your constituency….not what Najib promised, not what Pak Lah promised. Of course Toyo promised nothing, because to him semuanya ok. Oh he did…..set up a personal service centre, but run by a representative. Make sure that happens.

You will from today onwards be the cynosure of all eyes, yes the whole nation will be watching. Everybody will be watching. But if you stay your course, you have nothing to fear. But you will have to fear the army of parasites that will come a-calling. Watch your back, young man. Your dowry has jettisoned so you got to stay focused. Keep your brother and sisters away from the grease.

You were reported to say that the most pressing demands from the constituents included basic infrastructure, welfare and land grants. I know you can handle welfare, but infrastructure and land grants would include the big boys and like all big boys in the Government, they don’t come cheap (read, free-with-strings-attached). A neighbor-character may steal some of the land for your people to build mansions for his extended family. Developers will be at your door-steps with gifts (that you may have to pay for after the fact.) You have to watch your step….the guy who pave the way for your safe passage is the guy you have to watch. He is the guy who will be watching for your mis-step.

Above all, YB, you must be your own man. You are nobody’s man. You are the peoples’ man. You must not be Samy’s man, or Pak Lah’s man, or Najib’s man. Did I miss out Toyo on purpose? Yes sir. You must never be his man. Do I have to spell out how he cant even control his state assemblymen, the bunch of pirates. You are your late father’s SON, your siblings BROTHER, the people of Ijok’s MAN, and nobody’s man.

You will be busy and preoccupied with the affairs of Ijok and State. DON’T FORGET QUALITY TIME FOR/WITH YOUR SIBLINGS. They come before the State and your constituents.

It is because I see in you an essentially good man that I am posting these. There will be a lot of temptations now. You must have the strength, the strength of character your late father imbued into you, to resist these temptations. They are very real and hard to resist.

Until I see you for a cup of kopi at Kopitiam King Kuan, I wish you success in all that you set out to do. But just be careful….DON’T JUMP INTO ANYTHING UNLESS YOU ARE VERY SURE THAT IT IS SAFE!

ZAM IN ANOTHER JAM

The Star reported that your (not mine, do you mind!) Minister of Information SLAMMED the BBC for interviewing Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim. I take umbrage over the use of the word slam. A gnat bites, stupid. A big guy slams a puny guy, bodoh! Well probably slams rhymes with Zam. A little bit of alliteration does improve the literary quality of a political newsletter.

What the above political news organ did not report is the verbatim tele-conversation that transpired between the Minister and BBC's World Service Director (WSD) and its World Service Commissioning Editor (CE). Hantu (v.5April posting) was able to secure an unexpurgated transcript of the conversation:

JAM : Selamat Pagi
WSD : Yes, hello Mr Cellmate Peggy
JAM : I am saying Good Morning
CE : Splendid. Who are we speaking to?
JAM : I am Yang Berhomat Datuk ......(static interference).......
WSD : Hello Mr. Yang. How can we help you?
JAM : I am the Minister of Information of Malaysia.
CE : An honour to speak to you, old chap!
WSD : What's rocking ...... (static)....and brewing old sport?
JAM : This has got nothing to do with Rocky's Bru.
CE : What then, old chum?
JAM : I am not old for your information.
WSD : Sorry, old lad, its an English term of .......(static)...endearment....(static)....
JAM : I dont take deer meat, unless it is halal.
CE : (whispering) I think he has a hearing impediment.
WSD : What's .....(static) eating you anyway?
JAM : No I have not eaten. Why you interview Anwar Ibrahim?
CE : Oh, Mr. Anne-wah. Well, because he was finally available. We have been meaning to
interview him months ago. He has been too busy with speaking engagements, jolly busy
this Anne-wah chappy.
JAM : Of all person, why do you want to interview a bankrupt politician?
WSD : Hold your horses, Mr Yang. Of the 72,360 declared bankrupt in Malaysia since 2002,
your Deputy Minister in the Prime Minsiter's Department, a Mr. Kay-vee-ass says that
Mr. Anne-wah is not a bankrupt.
CE : And Mr. Yang. we dont take kindly to libellous pronouncements against our guests.
JAM : What did I pronounce wrongly?
CE : (whispering...) Nigel....this chap is a tad bloody dense.
WSD : What else Mr. Yang?
JAM : I dont understand why you gave a platform to an unwanted politician who was rejected
by the people.
CE : That's a dastardly accusation, Mr Yang
JAM : I did not accuse you of being a bastard!
WSD : I'll let that go. Disqualified maybe, but unwanted, definitely no, old boy.
CE : Our record says he never lost an election. So how can he be rejected?
JAM : Why dont you interview Mr. Lim Kit Siang, he is the Opposition Leader.
WSD : Jolly smashing idea. But in fact we already have a recorded interview embargoed to
air soon.
CE : In fact I have the transcript of the interview....let me see.....here it is....an interesting
observation about you....under buying of titles....no....under buying of votes.....ermmmm...
are yes, here it is....under buying of awards....says here you were bestowed a prestigious
award....some Takoh Watawan Negara.....nothing to do with death-defying leap from
Nigara Falls, old sport?
WSD : Mr Yang, are you still with us?
JAM : I am not happy you gave Anwar this opportunity.
CE : The BBC management approves our choice. We are very discerning about who we inter-
view. Mr. Anne-Wah is very charismatic, very eloquent, superbly articulate, impeccable
diction and above all globally visible. However, we can make an exception in the name of
good international relations. Can you be available for an interview.
JAM : Yes.
WSD : Capital. We will schedule Tim Sebastian of HardTalk to do you the honours.
CE : Mr Yang......Mr Yang....
WSD : He slammed down the phone Neil.

He slammed down the phone. So that's why the Star says he "slams News Channel over interview
with Anwar. Latuk, you miss an opportunity to trumpet your communication skills. On hindsight, it is a good decision. We might loose tourists and Tengku Adnan might label you a liar. Best both of you slam shut your mouth. Both of you got into an embarrassing situation like the above pic. If both of you want to address the international stage, best you practise with RTM 1 or 2.

Ground Zero; Ijok : With K Pathiban:Hantu and the CIA:Part 2

ENGAGING K PATHIBAN

We sat down at the kopi-tiam where the apek boss called Pathiban Chegu.

At first look, I liked what I saw. I instantly liked Chegu Pathiban. We left it to experienced ex-journo, now turned bloggers Rocky and Noraina to engage Pathiban, whilst we others observed.

Yes, I like the way he handled the questions. I admonished him on the photo evidence we had of MIC youths making derogatory and unbecoming gestures on nomination day. His reply was that he did not see that. I advised he read blogs. He humbly said he would. I liked his clean shaved face, pleasant demeanor, clean shirt, polished pair of shoes. His bearing made a good statement of good breeding despite poor beginnings.

I felt sad though because I fear for him.

If he wins, his handlers will spoil him like they always do to neophytes. I felt sad that he might be in the company of questionable second-liners, since the heavies after much talk, promises ad infinitum would have left and reappear again when...........................................

My fondest wish for him, Pathiban, is that he loses this election.

If he loses, he will remain the gentleman everybody knows him to be. If he loses, he remains the clean person that I know he intrinsically is.

If Pathiban loses he would get out of the clutches of the MIC and Barisan N.

Young man, because I like you I hope that you do not get elected and be used.

Finally from one ex-chegu to another allow me to say this: Politics (in Malaysia) insidiously and imperceptibly corrupts a person. You are too nice to be a politician. So I hope for you own sake, you do not win.

One last parting shot: Beware of those who pat you on the back . It maybe a prelude to a stab there. Be wary of
those who give you the Premium Grade smile, teeth and all. It may be a rehearsal to a bite. Also be aware of the throngs who shake your hands, especially those with greasy palms and there will be hordes of them .
So, Pathiban, I hope you do not win and you can sleep easy. Think about this.

Snippets from Hantu:

Overheard from the next table from one bumi to another: Vote for Pathiban. Our mentri besar says that our religious teachers say it is not haram to vote for another race. Since when has this been an issue. Think about this.

Hantu asked two shoppers at the emporium a few doors away from the kopi-tiam: So how do you feel about the Mentri Besar appointing his personal representative to be in Ijok after the election? The reply: A bit too late....Datuk Siva died waiting for many things.I retorted that they should accept this magnanimous gesture! Reply: okay lah, if the rep makes his service centre on the now-closed landfill. What does that say? Think about that.

Hantu asked a heavy-set chinaman what he thought of all the big guns coming to Ijok. I had to dig deep into my meagre hokkien to deduce this: Come, eat free, talk, talk, talk and then leave us alone. Such stark truths. Think about this.

Hantu whispered to me before we sent off K Pathiban. "Why are you so patronising towards the two Americans. Cant you smell the CIA? Dumb me, I never thought of the possibility. But no fear, I engaged one of them over the NFA...their National Firearms Association.

Ground Zero: Ijok Dateline:24April.Part 1

Yesterday, 24 April was a busy but fulfilling day. Eric Woon of I am a Malaysian generously gave me a lift to the spanking new Jalan Duta court complex to lend support to Jeff Ooi. The exterior was awesome but (well, that is subject for a later posting.)

Since Jeff's case achieved what was planned we gathered for Tuesday Mee Rebus at Cafe14teen. At 1.45pm, Big Dog of Bigdogdotcom Pajaro-ed Rocky of Rocky's Bru, Noraina of 3540 Jalan Sudin, A Voice of Another Brick in the Wall, and yours truly to ground zero Ijok.

I was, for once, so impressed by the BN election machinery in evidence. I mean the convoy of humoungous trucks, bull-dozers, and other assorted accoutrements of frenzied activities. The poster warfare spelt out the feverish last moment shopping for votes from the denizens of Ijok constituency.

The BN heavies were buzzing around but we were not interested to hear their tired and tried tales. We asked around for the two contenders. Why not engage the heavies? We leave that to the NST and the Star who would dutifully portray their political bosses grinning from ear to ear and carrying
children. The last time they went into these antics was when the late Datuk Sivalingam was elected.They came, talk and disappeared for so long that Datuk Siva couldn't wait no longer. He gave up ......the ghost.

Not aware of the contenders itinerary we continued to look for leads. However, it was not difficult to spot us....the full bodied Big Dog, the Towering Rocky, the fast-talking A Voice, the metallic-gray-haired guy with his ever-present shoulder-strap handbag (humbly yours) and the always beautiful Noraina, black-capped and in shades. Rocky was spotted a former associate and we were given the whereabout of our quest. Move on to Part 2.

Malaysiakini Will Never Walk Alone!

ZORRO, TORNADO,HANTU WILL WALK WITH MALAYSIAKINI, NOW AND ALWAYS.

Can Do Favor Or Not?

RM36million Windfall for Ijok Folks, screamed the Sun. No wonder a blogging colleague made a soul-searching, gut-wrenching remark: Only when BN's MPs and Assemblymen die in office, they will be doing their constituency a great favor.

A morbid thought, but nonetheless equally brilliant!

Must we wait for a BN death before a landfill can be immediately closed down? Must a BN someone be confined to a depth of 6 feet before all the pot-holes, in our self-proclaimed developed state, be filled? Must a BN annointed give up the ghost to bring life to a ghost town? Why does it take two years for a grant to be approved for school repairs? Only when/if a BN fellow passed on the request is immediately passed.

When a national/state lawmaker is permanently certified as departed, notice how all and sundry descend (see pic) from all directions come to "feed" and be fed. This is a disgusting sight but it has happened and is happening today (circa Ijok).

RM36million! BN money or OUR (rate/tax payers) money? If it is our money who gave the BN approval to use our money to buy votes? Can BN be prosecuted for coveting our money for their own ends? I dont want an answer from the Election Chief....to me he is a hired-hand and a nonentity. We need the answers from our Legal Eagles out there.

How come, especially in our developed State, after every storm recently-filled potholes become potty again. According to Hantu, my winged partner, small jobs are given to small-time Ali(read UMNO) Baba (read MIC/MCA) contractors. Big-time crony contractors do only big jobs, like now in Ijok. They don't only bring in their tractors and equipment, they bring in Mawi and MGR clones to inject life into this semua-nya okay one-horse town. Water-supply and electricity will be in abundance; bridges, even not necessary, will be built; things must be seen to be done for this simply easy-to-please kampong folks. Many things must be seen to be done because RM36million must not necessarily be seen to be charitably shared. Give the icing to these simple Ijok folks, the cake will be ..........So Who Next to do us a favor?

My Last Post?

By 1600hrs tomorrow April 13, all blogs will be IMPLODED I have been warned. This will probably be your last posting. However, the good news is that what you post (your wish-lists) may come to fruition after this implosion. I am blessed with a current blogroll of Malaysia's alpha-bloggers, the real movers who themselves have amassed a blogroll of the most talented young turks who want to effect a paradigm shift on how they want this country to have a new vision and direction.

We have been led like zombies into believing semua-nya ok. We want to change the rules. This country needs a make-over. This country must be revived with a massive blood transfusion. HOW?

This final posting is to PERSUADE Raja Nazrin Shah, the Sultan-in-waiting of my homestate Perak, to offer himself as the next Prime Minister of Malaysia. Who says a royal cannot be a Prime Minister? Our first PM was of royal lineage! Nothing is impossible. The genuine (this adjective is necessary to dissociate from the many pretenders infesting this country) Napoleon said that the word impossible can only be found in the dictionary of fools.

Raja Nazrin's recent speech delivered to Young Malaysians was a refreshing breeze in this current doldrum. For the past 60 years (assuming I attained the age of reason at age 7) I was made to believe that, although born in Taiping, Perak, Malaysia, I am a tenant in this beautiful piece of Asia. His speech jolted me out of this zombisque stupor. This future King declared that Malaysians of all races, religions and geographic locations need to believe beyond a doubt that they have a place under the Malaysian Sun....and all have equal rights and responsibility to take ownership of their country and that Malaysia belongs to all Malaysians equally. Never had any our our leaders dared to utter such declarations (considered anathema). Beyond a shadow of a doubt; equal rights;equally played mental gymnastics in my mind.

The grand Alliance of the 50s played its role in the fight for Independence. We still revere those founding fathers. A new creature, the Barisan Nasional, complacent at never being challenged seriously, today has lost its moral compass. Today it is mired with a litany of diseases: corruption, decadence, profligacy, ignorance, misconduct, defilement, falsification, nefarious, chicanery, discrimination, coarseness and vileness.

Raja Nazrin, without a shadow of a doubt you have the mettle to make long overdue changes. You have every equal right to claim the premiership, despite your royal status. Only with your leadership will Malaysia belong to all Malaysians equally.

I have made my stand even if this will be my last post. It was a well-meaning post. ...my most sincere post to date.

To MarinaM, Kak Teh, Mat Salo, Jacqui's Curve, Anon fm Miri and Big Dog: I have picked you to make your last post. God guide your fingers. Please visit http://www.urbanmonk.net to get the full details on what you have to do.

What Others Say about Zam & Sham!

I realize that most of us (sometimes) are unable to surf all the blogs. The following have posted on these two (s)elected ones: RantingsMM, Screenshots, Rocky Bru, 3540 Jalan Sudin, Kickdefella,
and Zorro Unmasked. Some Bloggers may have done likewise. I am sorry if I have not mentioned you. Today, I have picked out some good commenters who left indelible footprints in the obove-mentioned blogs. With your belated permission I present your comments (verbatim) for our readers:

Postings to RantingsbyMM

walski69 said...

There is a book that all of our esteemed nitwits should read, and that's Thomas Friedman's "The World is Flat".

It's the sort of book (if you're a Malaysian policy-maker) that would make you wanna take a large stainless-steel spatula, whack yourself on the forehead (with the blunt side) and between the "Ouch"s, swear loudly and curse themselves on how they've squandered the last several years bickering over the most trivial of things.

Okay, a little melodramatic, perhaps...

But seriously, if we ever wanna be first world, all these 3rd world control freaks had better wise up...

Daphne Ling said...

Oh-heheheheteeeeheeeeteeeheeeeteeheekakakaka...*Hiccup**hiccup samore*...

Adohai...Why la we have ministers and the penolongs who waste their time trying to 'kill' bloggers when there are better things to do?

Don't they learn anything from the "Dilarang Membuang Sampah" sign? Don't they learn that the more you want to stop it, the more people will do it just to show you they can? So the more they try and stop the influence of bloggers, the more they will have bloggers mushrooming everywhere...My friend just started her blog, as I type this! *Snickers*

Someone please tell the minister that many asli villagers still got no clean water, energy supply in many kampungs still under the recommended level, and communications still sucks (Under the banner that says: 'Celcom is the best', Celcom got no line...Beside the banner 'Digi, wider coverage', Digi also got no line)...

We live in Bolehland, remember? Lagi you say tak boleh, lagi ler they show you they boleh...

NURAINA A SAMAD said...

u know the email u sent me? i was speechless. struck dumb. what else, what else? how much more stupid can we get? I never cease to surprised by more and more stupid statements. people get stupid-er than the last person who was stupid.

their stupidity comes from plain ignorance.
they have no idea what they are talking about. they have no idea what a blog is. to them blogs are rocky's bru, malaysia today, screenshots, sang kelembai, the scribe, rocky's bru, malaysia today, screenshots, sang kelembai....

khengsiong said...

Don't kill our creativity!

We no longer can compete with China or Vietnam over wages. We must compete on ideas...

Our conservative YB apparently do not understand that open channels of communications are essential in fostering a creative society.

politikus said...

i believe (the ministry's intention) is for those with domains using com/net/org.MY extension need to register.

there is NO WAY the govt can possibly regulate bloggers on blogspot, wordpress etc etc.

and i mean no way :)

Daryl W.T. Lau said...

Bloody Amazing! That statement officially sent our beloved country back to the stoneage in the eyes of the world.

marcia said...

the comment i posted in the star on this issue.

"i absolutely love what our lovable DEWC minister said. he is the personified, living and breathing example of the vision of what is this country becoming. i will have a most exquisite time telling my foreign friends from developed nations what well-thought out measures our government takes to curb intellectual thoughts. indeed, our neighbour, the "fine" city it is, would be delighted that someone has thought of something even they havent even dreamed about. what's all this nonsense of unsubstantiated claims of leadership incompetence in this country. they dont know what they're talking about.... OF COURSE, they're substantiated! you just read the article. my, my... malaysia... almost truly Asia. oh dear.. look at the time. i have to dash now, i'm moving to Cuba. maybe i'll start blogging there."

its bad enough that newspapers are regulated, i understand their concerns for national security, but how do they know how much is too much? now they want to regulate blogs? no way, sure they say that if you're innocent and say the right things, you'll be okay, but do we need "parents" breathing down our necks? who will be in charge of moderating and enforcement? are they intelligent? no way, give these guys an inch, they'll take a foot.

Postings at Screenshots:

Just think back about 3.5 yrs ago Jeff , blogging was a little different then ;).
The days of Johan and your blog were the first blogs i started reading .
Who would of thought it would become what it is today , even in oz bloggers must be careful.Especially during election , one is not allowed to sway votes .
Btw oz is on its on road to censor bloggers , http://www.901am.com/2007/australian-government-set-to-censor-bloggers.html
Honestly i can't imagine how it can be done , the amount of blogs is ???????

The public outcry will be deafening, and the pressure of global opinion will crush them.

It's pretty much a battle of nerves, who'll be the first one to blink?

Posted by: Fuzzie

am not a blogger but a blog reader.i would like to congratulate u guys on forming malaysian bloggers alliance.
GET UP,STAND UP, STAND UP FOR YOUR RIGHT
GET UP,STAND UP, DON'T GIVE UP THE FIGHT
MALAYSIAN UNITE!

Posted by: kehoe

Alam said...

Saudara,
Artikel ini sedikit lapuk tetapi pasti mengingatkan kita bahawa Zam ini manusia yang mempunyai banyak warna dan corak, mengikut kehendak zaman dan tertakluk pada siapa yang memimpinnya.

di petik dari: http://www.cpj.org/attacks02/asia02/malay.html

Some officials accused the Western press of conspiring against Malaysia. In May, hard-liner Datuk Zainuddin Maidin, then parliamentary secretary at the Information Ministry, reacted to a local seminar held on World Press Freedom Day (May 3) by saying, “The big problem faced by the Asian countries now after the end of the cold war is the infiltration by subversive elements from the developed countries through their media and the use of local journalists to carry out the agenda of Western media imperialism.” Zam, as he is known in Malaysia, then accused journalists from the Philippines and Thailand of trying to influence Malaysia on behalf of the West. In November, Zam was promoted to the even more influential post of deputy information minister.

nyx said...

Zainuddin said in the quest for political power, people were willing to resort to slander, disseminate lies, use unauthorised sources or choose not to verify the source of the information.

"This is very dangerous as they are writing and taking steps to gain power. Their objective is to topple the government, widen the reach of their political doctrine and assist any parties for political purposes," he said.

Is this not slandering, disseminating lies, and using unauthorized and unverified sources?

Where is your sources or evidence to justify that your statement is true and not merely slandering?

Anonymous said...

there are two sets lo laws; one for you and me; and the other which is as good as lawless for the government.
in any event, the govt has no choice but to regulate blogs one way or another. simply, the govt cannot allow its monopoly on information or disinformation disssemination to be broken by blogs. once they regain control of information flow, they can relax and conitnue to plunder the country with impunity. just listen to the latest outburst by the venerable mr samy. you want to cry for Malaysia.

Postings at Rocky’s Bru:

A KADIR JASIN said...

Sdr Rocky,
Saya lebih bersimpati dng pembesar Zam daripada marah kepadanya.
Apa lagi yang boleh beliau lakukan dalam kapasiti beliau sekarang?
Daripada seorang wartawan kanan Zam memilih untuk menjadi ahli politik.
Sebagai ahli politik, Zam tentulah terpaksa bertindak, beraksi dan berlakon seperti orang politik.
Kalau sebagai wartawan Zam kritikal terhadap Singapura, sebagai politikus dia terpaka tukar rentak kerana pemerintahan yang dianggotainya sangat mesra Singapura.Terima kasih.

hasilox said...

If Zam were to copy Spore policy, copy first the way Spore deal with corruption or abuse of power!

Kata Tak Nak said...

I agree with hasilox. The people hate corruption, Singapore deals with it wonderfully then learn from them. The people want their voices to be heard, Singapore muffled them effectively, don't copy them. If our leaders can do this, they will get my votes otherwise forget it.

Clark Gable of Pulau Duyong said...

Of all the things S'porean are good at ZAM with little brilliance that he has decided to learn on how S'pore stiffled the free speech.

While he is at it,he would take the trouble ,i suppose,to learn how S'pore deal with corruption, transparency and efficient governing and choose a good leaders amongst their rank and file.The criteria for leadership certainly would exclude people like ZAM in S'pore, as this unprinciple and idealess minister wouldnt even qualify to be an officeboy in S'pore Government.

ZAM didnt go to seek understanding but little knowhow that make him shotup like a tall poppy in a group of mediocre cabinet.
I dont think ZAM would understand when told of corruptions,transparency etc as

"It is difficult to get a man (ZAM)to understand something when his job depends on not understanding it."
Upton Sinclair

shar101 said...

And I thought ZM was in RDC trying to figure out how the Malaysian cabinet can 'emulate' their southern brethren in terms of good governance et al including enjoying salary scales of between RM2.7 million or RM5 million in keeping with the private sector.
Meanwhile, is there any truth that ZM will be replaced by RY in the MOI?

barisanasional said...

rocky, the poster is good but the wording at below, barisan najis really hurts my feeling.

Rocky's Bru said...

barisanasional,
noted. as the poster belongs to mob's crib, i will do the needful by conveying your displeasure with the "barisan najis" bit.
thank you.

mob1900 said...

Thanks to Rocky for informing me about your concern Mr. Barisanasional.

The BN I potrayed are fictional entity that exists in Bolehland or Bedolland. At Bolehland, my chracters runs rampant, they cheat, lied, name-call, siphon and leech people's trust in them. Which country in the real world have you heard of, does so much tragic comedy at one go? ~ehem...

Again I like to reiterate all my 'posters' are fictional unless proven true in your mind. Have a laugh and try not to take it seriously.

Postings at Kickdefella:

Big Dog says:

Whether what the Minister’s call can be implemented or not, that is another problem of another operational level. Most probably the Minister is just making a statement because its Q & A time in the Dewan Rakyat. In another words, its just, politics.

I had a quiet and interesting chat with lawyer Harris Ibrahim, Eric Woon and Shanghai Fish (separately) on Thursday at NPC and raised about the underlying principle of Bloggers Alliance. Its unprecedented. Never before a body being registered with ROS which is built on intangibles. Its similar to having Persatuan Pemilik E Mail Malaysia (which doesn’t exist).

The membership of this society is about collection of individuals (with name, IC etc) but what he/she represent, is totally intangible and uncertifiable. Infact, it can’t be certified to a particular individual entirely. Unlike a webhost, where there is proof of payment aka transaction, which include a credit card, cheque etc, blogs are free.

(Example, how does anyone know this Blog belongs to Syed Azidi? Is there a certificate to show this Blog belongs to Syed Azidi? Somebody could create and operate this Blog, telling people it is Syed Azidi @ Sheih but in actual fact, its not. For example, Dato’ Shahrir Samad blog is not him doing it but someone else, totally.

However, when Bloggers Alliance is formed, Syed Azidi will be admitted as a member, paying full fees and voting rights, NOT the blog)

If that is such, how would the Ministry would want to register Blogs. Can they resolve the issues I raised earlier? Will the Ministry be registering Kickdefella.wordpress.com or Syed Azidi @ Sheih? Under what grounds does this real person by the name of Syed Azidi needs to register himself with the Ministry? Can the Ministry prove he is kickdefella.wordpress.com?

Hani said

Zorro said…

Big Dog you got to sit on this guys face and Clark Gabl and his surgeon friend can stitch up both ends …..we need to close up both his extremeties…..because of late what comes out are the putrid wastes from a broken sewage.

Good advice, zorro!

· Sheikh's Brother

Shaziman is the new breed of mid thirties, early forties UMNO Malay. They are the first post NEP generation coming into power in UMNO. Others are Noh Omar (last time Dep Min of Int Affairs), Azeez Mat Rempit and the like. These kids are the ‘cannot speak English generation’. This means they totally cannot think logically.
If the previous bunch of UMNO leaders are idiots, you are now seeing these new bunch of nuts. Total idiots. They dont read anything except Malay literature (Mangga, Utusan Malaysia, Berita Harian, Surat Layang, kisah Dato K and Siti Nurhaliza, Akademi Fantasia ratings etc).

· msiaman

This Shaziman fellow and the rest of the ‘alat-alat almari’ must have been hearing the frustration from the first family and trying to be a champion to come up with new initiatives to help cover the situation. At the rate the exposes are going, the guys can be pushed into a dictator or lose his position and possibly everything.

Postings at Zorro Unmasked:

Jacqui’s Curve from Germany:

You are hilarious Zorro! I had to seek Wikipedia's help to define if our Parliament is a zoo or a circus.(http://www.wikipedia.org/)

ZOO - A zoological garden, zoological park, or zoo is a facility in which animals are confined within enclosures and displayed to the public, and in which they may also be bred.

CIRCUS - A circus is most commonly a traveling company of performers that may include acrobats, clowns, trained animals, hula hoopers and other novelty acts and the word also describes the performance that they give. A circus is held in an oval or circular arena with tiered seating around its circumference; in the case of traveling circuses this location is most often a large tent.

The circus is thought to have had its origin in Ancient Rome, where the circus was an open-air stadium where chariot and horse races and other public exhibitions were held.

What do you think?

Shar101:

Instead of going after bloggers to register, why isn't the government making the extra effort to register the 4.9 million eligible new voters for the next GE?

Hang on, I hear a little bird whispering..."Are you mad or what. Them new voters will vote us out of office lah!"

Hmmm...wonder if it was owl-speak that I just heard.

Hoot, hoot.

Clark Gable from Pulau Duyong:

Dearest Zorro,
Did discuss with a Surgeon friend of mine with regards to the above patient.

I showed him the picture,he thought i was joking or something.
When i questioned him why,he said,"the procedure needed is quite extensive and expensive ".

"But thats besides the point as the National Assoc of Blogger is willing to pay for the cost", i reassured him(Right Zorro? I dont have that kind of money you know)

" In that case it got to start with the lips repair by stiching up up for prolong period as nothing good seem to come out of it"

CGOPD:
He is a Deputy Minister he need to speak up.

Surgeon:
He can talk from the other end.

CGOPD :
Wouldnt that be imcomprehensible at the very best.

My Surgeon Friend:
He'll learn fast enough ,dont you worry.

On further examination he noted the sweater he is wearing.


Surgeon:
Why is he dressed like that

CGOPD:
For his own safety,he keep on biting his own tongue.

Surgeon:
OK,i shall book him for sugery on next available list...april fool day next year.Exclusive list made for people like him.
I got 4 so far.Do you have many patients like this for me.

CGOPD:
Do you stitch up rectum too?

Surgeon:
Are you talkin' of RRR hah haha haha ..you are very funny Mr CGOPD.
Can you get Pam's autograph for me?

I laughed along with him,knowing Pam certainly help me going places, dont you think so?

Please get the treasurer to bank into my Swiss acount Swift: 342566-786878-88 asap.

ps; please include 10% extra for my kopi o ,you know what i mean.

Rocky’s Bru said:

Zorro,

I think All-Blogs can agree to cover the expenses for this guy's surgery. We'll raise the funds. If Clark Gable does a good job sealing the guy's mouth, we'll raise more funds to pay him a bonus.

On a serious note, I hope Shahziman takes steps to make up for this serious blooper so early in his parliamentary career. He is young and educated, and I had expected more of him. He should stop learning making Zam his mentor.

The PM, of course, will not heed to your advice, Zorro.

Btw, thanks for the alert on Kata Tak Nak. I went to his blog. My heart went along to him.

Kata Tak Nak said:

What do you expect, if he remains silent then the cabinet will accuse him of not doing his job. If he speaks he would be labelled stupid, a label he shares with all ministers, deputies and parliment secs and 4/5 of all mps.

Anyway to him a blog is a log with the letter 'b' in front.

Postings at 3540 Jalan Sudin:

Nurainah of Jalan Sudin posted Mekyam’s comment to her as her main post.

" Nuraina: This is going back to basics -- basic propaganda.

I'm with you. They ARE ignorant, but not THAT stupid! It's not blogging per se they are against, it's having their DISHONESTY, IRRESPONSIBILITY and TREACHERY against Malaysia and Malaysians EXPOSED!

Like you said, they are just using a blanket accusation against local bloggers. They are not concerned about those Malaysians who blog about their personal interests and idiosyncrasies.

They want to stop bloggers who are concerned and informed, who blog openly and intelligently under their own names, from revealing things the government would rather keep from public scrutiny. This is directed at owners of news-portals like Malaysiakini and MalaysiaToday too, especially the latter, because Raja Petra provides interactivity not unlike blogging for every news and article on his site.

They have labeled these bloggers and news-portal owners as "politically-motivated bloggers," making it sound like being politically motivated is a dirty word.

It is NOT! If "politically-motivated" is what some Malaysians do, advertently or indvertently, to thwart actions of public servants, from the PM on down, which are not in the public interest, then why shouldn't these bloggers be politically motivated? They are after all Malaysians.

In fact each and everyone of us breathing Malaysians, whether we are blogging or not, should be politically-motivated. Politics concerns us. All of us have a vested interest in all things political. In fact, the trouble with Malaysians is that we have not been political enough. We have been too complacent and uncomplaining about how we are being governed. That is why the current government think they can get away with what they're doing.

Politics is the simply the tool of governance. Thus it touches every aspect of our lives as citizens. Who are they, these people we ELECT and PAY to take care of our politics (i.e the running and governing of this political entity we call Malaysia for us Malaysians), to tell us not to be politically-motivated? Who are they to start this propaganda, this smear assaults, against our some of us for being good responsible citizens? Who are they to turn around and attack us for defending our rights? How dare they!

I'm not a blogger and not likely to be one anytime soon, but this bullying and sly vindictiveness of our elected representatives, especially ignorant ones, really incenses me as a citizen."

Mat Salo said:

Mek Yam! Touche! Excellent commentary Mek Yam...

If it's up to me this comment should be published in the - day I say it?- ENESTY or STAR where EVERY citizen deserve to hear this very apt summation of the current state of the Malaysian politico-blogo scene...

You are right, I can't stand the "bullying" either!

Galadriel said:

You know Nuraina, I think this whole "gertak" business is because we as citizens have always let elected reps get away with it.

They all dah biasa. So they forgot that an elected government is still the servant of the masses.

All these while people have been "discouraged" to criticise and demand accountability. With blogging's viral propensities, it is irrepressible. It is the fact that Malaysians read blogs that disturbs the politicians.

Information can fuel meaningful decision-making. They muzzled the media. So it is no surprise that Malaysians turn to blogs for information.

If this means empowering people, bringing accountability, improving governance and instilling ethics in the powers that be (yes i'm a romantic), then GO BLOGGERS !!!

Jacqui’s Curve (a Malaysian in Germany):

"In fact, the trouble with Malaysians is that we have not been political enough. We have been too complacent and uncomplaining about how we are being governed. That is why the current government think they can get away with what they're doing."

Mekyam raises many good points. However, referring to the quote above, I would like to give my two-cents worth. Some Malaysians are afraid to rock the boat because they do not want to risk jeopardising their families' livelihood. They could be sole breadwinners. Actions of some family members (who are merely dependents) ultimately affect the rest of the family. That is the risk some won't take.

I admit some just give up trying to say anything because they think "what is the point? I won't be heard."

That said, I am glad there are some people speaking out intelligently for the others (through blogs)- speaking for those who cannot and would not.

“The nation will find it very hard to look up to the leaders who are keeping their ears to the ground”- Winston Churchill

Mat Rempit hubris dari Carthage said:

To MEKYAM!

Keep up the brilliant comments Mekyam!You make my day!

Blogs have the potential to turn into a credible source of information and education for society, and it is exactly these kind of well thought out comments that are going to turn the POTENTIAL into REALITY.Though you usually keep your comments short and sweet I have been mentioning your name to some friends as someone to watch out for!I have been saying "She's definitely worth a read! The linguistic expression that she uses is a joy to read and the sequencing of her thoughts, simply delectable!"

Its a pity that due to a certain obnoxious fella on Sheih , you have decided to not comment more there- alas, as an empowering agent, not everyone has the wisdom to distinguish that the quantity of the comments is no where near as important as the quality!

Wish more like you Mekyam!

PS- Some others to watch out for is Roxanne and Loneranger- i always read and marvel at their mastery of the language!

Hi&Lo said:

This is a nugget of wisdom from Mek Yam. If we don't care abt what's happening to our country, future generations will be damned.

We may be powerless as individuals but collectively we can shake and move things.

Despite the elected reps ineptitude to listen, the noise level will be too hard for them to ignore.

Nstman said:

How many people are like jeff ooi and rocky, who dare to speak out at the risk of compromising their livelihood. It takes a lot of guts and for that I salute these two icons. Oops, not to forget Nuraina, susan, marina, and the many brave women who have more guts than most of the men in Malaysia. these are the people who walk the talk, walk the walk.

Shar101 said:

Hoowah! That's one helluva broadside from a broad.

*Sorry, Mekyam. I got a feeling you're a lady and 1st para was written for dramatic effect with the utmost respect.*

This administration is not just suffering from blogfear, it is also ill-equipped to respond to what bloggers are offering to the general public. Sending ZM to RDC to learn it's latest techniques to regulate blog activities is one fine example of our government's ineptness. When a little honesty would have tip the scales, obfuscation is still their game-plan.

And now that the Bloggers United movement has morphed into a tangible entity i.e. NAB, an upfront and in your face type of organisation for the purpose of engagement, will or can the government ignore our legitimate claim for democratic representation?

In a way, NAB's formation will invariably protect the majority of bloggers whose postings are personal in nature. The government's onslaught is indeed aimed at socio-political blogs as Mekyam mentioned but in their haste to refute, they have paintbrushed the entire blogosphere as anti-government.

It will still be an uphill battle but I'm certainly glad that some of us have made a stand. If we are politically-motivated, it's because our politicians are morally-deficient.

Mekyam takes a bow:

Alamak! Who shined the lights in my eyes? Ai..ai..ai..ai..ai!!!

One day you're sailing quietly through your fave Malaysian blogs, local and abroad, nodding your head in agreement here, mouthing "Damn Right!" there, wowing here and oooing there, gnashing your teeth in one and laughing yourself mental in another... and the next thing you know, that passionate tirade you typed and sent hurtling through yon cyber (which gave you even more satisfaction than the turkey on rye you were wolfing down after a hard day's work) rated its own Entry in the immensely popular 3540 Jalan Sudin! OMG!!!

Dear Nuraina, I feel like one of those stage extras being pulled from the wings to take a bow. Flattered and flustered. Thank you. You know, this could really get to a... GIRL's head. ;-)

Or as shar101 said... BROAD! I'm okay with broad. Broad is good as long as we're not talking about my behind. :-D

Thanks also to hi&lo, j.t., mrh-carthage and mat salo for the virtual pats on the back and the more than kind "hear! hear!". I was merely reechoing what you guys and those Malaysian bloggers I visit daily have been saying in many different ways.

j.t.,(Jacqui’s Curve) you are absolutely right. Not everybody can take the risk of standing up to be counted. Which is why I so admire these bloggers who put themselves on the line. I too number myself among the timid and the handicapped. But when called, I'd like these front liners to know that mekyam will not hesitate to help swell the ranks, raise the decibel of the din, add her coppers to the cause, dig the trenches, rip sheets for bandages, bungkus nasi lemak, swallow the microchip, apa sajalah...

mrh-carthage, at the risk of sounding like a mutual-admiration party and giving people toothache, I'd like to say that your articulate and plainspoken comments always stand out for me too. :-)

His Name is JAM. Only Zorro and Zewt starts with Z!

Who the FCUK are you to tell me not to Blog. You do not own my soul. I rather give it to the devil than sell it to you for a profit. Moreover I did not vote for your party, so I do not have to toe your party line. I rather you continue to shit into your pants (you don't wear undies?) and dirty our environment. We know how you became Deputy. They say you were a former journalist. How did I miss reading you? Or did you write or did the BP stuff. I think you couldn't write well....meaning I dont ever remember you. But you did make a circus act by accepting the award, when nobody wanted it or like somebody said, its paid for. Really or not? Bolehland. Anyway HANTU has collected some newsy about you....I will embargo that one...maybe tomorrow. Meantime, learn to wear panties.

GOOFER OF THE WEEK AWARD

Will somebody tell me if our Parliament is not a zoo or a circus, why are there monkeys monkeying around. Like the above. I dont even know who he is. Usually people I know are people of consequence. Of course monkeys are not my favorite animals. But I have never seen the species in straight jackets. Is this specimen so dangerous? Or poisonous? This character made a serious mistake. He spoke and he is idiocy reincarnate. He should have kept silent and we would not have branded him. Somebody told me that the only politician you can trust is the politician who doesnt open his mouth! He wants us to register? How innovative! Original....no way. Which tree did he swing in from? By the way, did Big Dog sit on this Sham fellow's face? He will need surgical reconstruction by Clark Gable of Pulau Duyong. Clark agreed to do it gratis on one condition.....he be allowed to permanently seal up this guys mouth, so he cannot put his foot in. Your wish granted CG.....heard that you had some eye problem.....told you never use the bino for too long a stretch.

As a parting shot. Some of us have been harassing Pak Lah over his collection at Parliament. How can our PM govern sanely when he has chronics like this pontificating on puerile things like registering bloggers? My dear PM, for your own safety and sanity you should flush these waste down you -know-where. You are the Chief Executive of some 24 million people. It doesn't say much about your judgment of character when you have fossils like this guy sniveling around you. Flush him out lah, Pak Lah.

Letting Loose Hantu.

HANTU has all along been the third member of our trio - Zorro, Tornado, Hantu. Not much is known about her (yes Hantu is a she!) because she has spent most of the time up in the rafters of the barn where Tornado is stabled. Of late Tornado has neighed (read whispered) to me that Hantu has put on some unwanted kilos and seemed devilishly bored. She has executed (but found the species unpalatable.....errrkk) all the rats in the barn and those that escaped her talons have sought refuge along Jalan Parliament.
So today, to commemorate the inaugural meeting of Bloggers Alliance, Hantu has been given unimpeded license to roam the hemisphere for blogsphere. {Sheih, she has insisted she follow us when we visit your Newcastle (Kota Baru) as she claims she has scores of cousins in Golok.}
She is at the service of every responsible blogger. Just whisper "hoot, hoot" (Hokkien for hantam) and she will swoop down to you. However if she does not respond within 5 minutes, it's best you head for the nearest sushi bar and do the hoot, hoot call. She has an unbridled lust for sushi and wasabe. Tornado feels she is a reincarnation of some lady samurai. I prefer to concur or she may go into the usual endless tirade about Tornado and I indulging in too much beers. I have set a program, one of which is she must visit Parliament (only when in session). But her daily visits must always include our town/city councils where our non-elected samsengs make their crooked deals. No? So welcome Hantu. She is at your service. No cash transactions please, some suchi or some free beer vouches for Tornado and Zorro. Hoot, hoot.

Let's Lighten Up A Bit Today

Let's be happy.....Rocky's case went on well....today at 9am Jeff too should be doing just as well.....I met beautiful Elviza and macho Mat Salo in the flesh....so today's posting is a happy posting.

The Value of a Drink
Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink
I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think
about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes
and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out
of work and their dreams would be shattered.
Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their
dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they
wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're
going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not"
~ Stephen Wright

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,
we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all
get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Without question, the greatest invention in the
history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the
wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does
not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!
~ Dave Howell

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers
One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm.
Here's how it went:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

Rocky Revisits Denmark House

TOMORROW 0900hrs 2nd APRIL MANY WILL CONTINUE TO WALK WITH ROCKY.
ZORRO DEFINITELY WILL BE THERE, UNMASKED OF COURSE.