BULLIES: Understanding the BEAST

Have you noticed, of late, the bullying trend of Utusan Malaysia. Like all bullies they prey on what they perceived to be someone weaker, like our Pakatan lady Member of Parliament. They even gave her the front page treatment, hopefully not antagonizing the First Woman.

But YB Teo gave as much as she got. If the muslim community did not like her they would not have INVITED her to participate in the aerobic program in the mosque grounds.

It wouldn’t take much to believe that Utusan, the protector of muslim libidos would prefer Ms Teo in these garbs though ridiculous for an aerobic session. Even if YB Teo had been attired such for the aerobic session, Utusan would still have much to say.

This gutter journalism so angered the President of the National Union of Journalist that he made a straight-from-the-gut tirade against his employers. HERE.

Aside: and they now want to conduct a domestic inquiry on Hata. Bullying again, not realising that he was speaking as President of NUJ and not as an employee! Dang, those nits at Utusan knows little about the Industrial Act.

Would understanding the anatomy of a bully help?

Robert S Drake wrote on 26 April, 2010

The bully ignores decency, compassion, kindness, cooperation and compromise. His methods are disrespect, disregard and disdain for others' suffering, dignity, rights, and cruelty.

What is it about grinding a fellow human being's spirit into the gravel that is so satisfying? How can a bully, for no apparent reasons but the perception of vulnerability and opportunity, inflict such suffering and humiliation that the victim might rather be dead than continue to endure it? How can a bully get satisfaction from crushing the spirit of innocents?

There are two types of bullies: The Wounding-Wounded (common bully), and the anti-social. The first can come to recognize the damage they perpetrate, learn to empathize and feel remorse, and change. The anti-social is incorrigible: their pathology is that they feel no remorse, have, and can have no empathy. They are without conscience or caring. They can't be changed or rehabilitated. The common bully is found everywhere in American society, but true pathological bullies are rare.

Bullies are opportunistic predators who use the illusion of power: posturing, cruelty and violence to control and degrade others, thus "proving" to themselves their own superiority. This behavior gives a clue to understanding the sickness. Understanding can give us perspective to deal with, and perhaps forgive, the bully for what she does. Understanding can help us to forgive ourselves for the weakness and shame one feels as the victim.

The bully is on a mission: Aggrandize the self. The "self" in question is spelled with a "little s," for the bully is possessed of an especially little self. It has long been known that "hurt people hurt people." Knowing the common bully is a weakling trying to prove his strength will not get us back our stolen lunch money; it will not heal the emotional wounds a victim can carry through life; it will not bring back a child bullied to, or beyond, the brink of suicide.

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Talk to you people on Thursday. Keep Well